Part of the Gift

Thought I'd take a moment to explain the name of my blog - Part of the Gift.  The name came from a quote I happen to like from a book geared towards of parents of autistic children.

"...my son is not a child with an affliction but a child with autism. ..autism is part of the gift, not the part of the gift that got damaged." - Thomas Cannon

The only issue I have with the quote is that, the way it is worded, it can seem like the author is saying that autism is a part of someone - like it could be removed.  However, in my mind, it is saying "my son himself is a gift, and autism is included as part of that gift, not a 'damaged part' of my son that, if removed, would make him more of a gift".  Does that make sense?  Autism is a way of being, experiencing, etc., so it is thoroughly woven through every experience.  I consider it part of his gift - just as I do his sweet personality, sense of humor and loving soul.

When my son was going through the diagnostic process back in '07 and '08, I was seeking information and found one depressing, hateful, spite-filled parent blog after another.  I absolutely believe it was because of this that I had my own bout with depression during that time, because EVERYTHING I read about autism or parenting an autistic child told me that we would live tragic, hopeless, lonely lives.  They told me to expect that I would never have a "real" relationship with my child.  It was horrible.  Because of that experience, I decided that I wanted to create a blog that shared the real story.  Not a woe-is-me, I'm-a-hero-cause-I-take-care-of-my-kid, martyr-style blog.  I can't STAND that shit!  No, I want to be real.  No bullshit, just real.  So, what's the real story?  Parenting an autistic kid is honestly no different than parenting a non-autistic kid.  Seriously.  I have one of each, and I parent them the same.  Yes, there are sometimes different ways I communicate with my son depending on the situation, and sometimes I have to handle things a little differently.  But, is it 1000% more stressful?  Nope.  Sure, there may be situations that stress me out, but 100% of the time it's because of something society/someone does towards my son that pisses me off...not him or autism.  To put it bluntly, it is society that is f'd up, not my kid...though society seems to think that the opposite is true.  We don't need to cure autistics, we need to cure society of their close-minded prejudicial ways.

OK, I'll step of my soap box now.  Just wanted to give a little explanation. :-)